Another Day, Another School Shooting

 Another Day, Another School Shooting

 

Horrific news that once again a child has killed other children in his school.   Everyone has a solution.  Arm the teachers, increase mental health services, lock those bad kids up for the rest of their lives, prosecute the parents- all such great ideas, few of which would prevent anything.

Again and again with every shooter, the same issue comes to the fore.  These kids did not feel known.  In fact, they were NOT known.  In the case of the Georgia child, the administrator went to what she thought was his class but had the wrong kid with a similar name.   Certainly, we can lock them up for the rest of their lives as Trump says of these “vicious, evil people”.   But they aren’t vicious or evil people.   They have done vicious and evil things, no question.   They were once babies and little people in kindergarten that were known to teachers and family.  What can we do to make kids feel known?

A principal at a California high school says he treats the first day of school like the first episode of a Netflix show he wants his students to binge on.  “The minute they walk through the door, I want to hook them so that they come back for more.”  On the first week of school teachers take it slow.  They don’t rush to introduce the syllabus or course requirements.  (What NO course pacing guide that makes everyday a milestone!!)   They play a version of beach volleyball.  Each colored section of the ball features questions- like “pet’s name”, “what movie do you want to act in”,  “what’s your favorite ice cream”.   Kids answer according to the section of the ball that faces them.  It’s fun, an ice breaker and a way for children to identify as something else besides a number on a seating chart.

Another thing to do is to believe what we learn from research.  The bigger the school the more anonymous the student.  Stop building high schools that hold several thousand kids.

Students are very happy to be back in school in person.   And now that they are, the anxieties of fitting in are growing.  School leaders have to be intentional about getting kids to feel they fit in the school.  Students need to feel that their well being matters.  They need to be seen for being really nice kids who are perhaps a bit different, and they need to fit in as well.

When they don’t get the attention they need from positive sources, they sure will from being that “evil” kid.  

Another day, another shooting will happen unless you notice me before rather than after, you know me for being bad.

STOP! That's mine!

 You can’t take my property!

 

School systems and private schools are disallowing cell phones in the school.  As with all things there are three sides to every story.   My side, your side and the right side.

Students say that the phone is their private property and the system cannot take it away.  One could split hairs and remind students that in almost all cases the phone itself is the property of the parent or whomever is paying the cell phone bill, most likely not the student.   Of course, we have a history of taking kids’ private property if it is not appropriate to school or we made a rule against it.  You cannot smoke on school property or we will take the tobacco away, ditto alcoholic beverages.  No weapons, no drugs.  Taking things from students we don’t want them to have has a long history.

What if there is an emergency, how can I contact my parents.  Depends on the emergency but most likely the school officials will contact your parents if it’s a true emergency.

I am a parent and I need to be able to reach my child!  Exactly why?   Do you allow your child to call you at work to chat?   School is your child’s  job.  He/she needs to be left alone to do that job.   And if you really need to get a message to your child, just call the front desk.  It will get through.

Data show that kids get hundreds of messages a day on their phone during school hours.   No, that was not a typo.  It’s very hard for kids to attend to their job (i.e. learning) when they also have to respond to all of those pings. And if you are a student, the pings may have more value than what the teacher is trying to do. Teachers don’t need children to do a constant dialog with their parents on what the teacher is doing.  Just one more reason teaching has lost a lot of its fun.  

Teachers and school administrators say kids don’t need phones in school.   Important messages to families can go through the office.   And then there are the not so important messages kids are sending- photos of bodily parts that are best left covered, insinuation about which students are dating (or not), having sex (or not) and just generally gossiping about what’s happening now.  

Most great compromises please no one and have something for everyone.  Put student phones in a safe place every morning so they can see where the phone is going, lock it up AND put the phone on the charger.   Teachers/administrators get peace to do their jobs.  Kids get a fully charged phone at the end of the day to use on the bus on the walk home.   See something for everyone.  And everyone gets something to be annoyed about too.

Oh, and by the way, the property isn’t the students and the school administrators can indeed take it.